I originally wrote this in Word to be copied and pasted. There are 4-pages that I've written that will stay as a word document only. Very insightful, but maybe too insightful. So let's scratch the surface of my brain in public while I work through the other 4 pages in private. I feel like a tease now. It was about leaps of faith and gratitude and changes in my life over the past year. That's about it.
I’ve heard numerous single clients talking about seeking “the one”. What is “the one” that they are referring to? In my opinion, people mean the person who they feel confident about spending the rest of their life with. I think most people are searching for this kind of person, regardless of what they may tell others. So let’s say you’ve found someone special in your life, how do you know that they are “The One”? Here’s a top ten list to help guide you:
10. The sex is incredible- you have never experienced such intense or frequent orgasms or had the desire for sex in such different positions or locations, you get the point. Fact is, sex is as much mental as physical, so if you’re deeply connected to your partner, the sex will be good.
9. You can talk for hours without being bored- lifelong compatibility is about having a lot of common interests and having good communication.
8. You can be silent for hours without being bored- even better than good conversation is good silence. It shows that you are truly comfortable together.
7. You lose all sense of logic and reason- you crave to be together all the time or you start thinking about marriage and/or children way before it is socially acceptable. You just feel like you want to dive head first into the relationship and be with your partner always.
6. You can confidently say you have never felt this way before- self explanatory, if other loves paled in comparison to this one, you might have just found true love.
5. You have similar life goals- you both want to start a family or start a business together or go sailing around the world, or whatever. Love alone isn’t enough- you need to have common life goals.
4. When you look into the future, you can see them in your plans- you find yourself thinking about having a family or being older or moving to another city or starting a new job, and your lover is always there, prominent in your future thoughts.
3. You have the desire to satisfy their needs over and above your own- you are interested in them as people, interested in their dreams and passions, their fears and worries. You want to be there for them and you hold their happiness above your own. For more info on this, look at my “What is Love?” article.
2. You want to share of yourself as much as possible- you can’t wait to introduce them to your friends and family, show them old pictures, and take them to your favorite places.
1. You love and appreciate them for their weaknesses as much as for their strengths- we all have strengths and weaknesses. However, you don’t feel critical of your partner for any of their weaknesses, in fact you appreciate their differences as being unique characteristics which make them the individuals they are.
Take a look at this checklist. If you find yourself checking off at least 7 or more of these items, you may just have found yourself “The One”! Save yourself the need for sex and couples therapy in the future and make sure you are making a commitment to your true life partner.