Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Hi Jerkface bad driving a-hole

Just want to send a special HI to the person driving the big Chevy truck who went completely out of your way to flip me off yesterday. It wasn’t my fault that you were in the wrong lane and needed over right when I was passing you. I gave you time to get over before I passed you. You didn’t do it. So what right do you have to not only honk at me, but then you proceed to follow me into the Target parking lot, roll down your window, stick your full arm out the window, and keep it out  with your middle finger up while you drove in a circle? Yes I flipped you off back. And had I been alone in my car I would have followed you to wherever YOU were going to see if you’re capable of explaining your anger with words. If your talking skills are anywhere near as good as your driving skills or manners, then it would’ve been a waste of time. I forgive you for being such a rude ass. I’m sure it’s hard being suck a d*ck and it probably makes you tired. And I know I get a little grumpy when I’m tired, so that’s probably why you were physically assaulting me from 30 feet away. Flipping somebody off the way that you did is pretty much the equivalent of getting in my face and shoving me or something. And doing so wrongfully. Jerkface. If I come across your path again I will make sure and stay on your side so you can’t get over at all. Payback’s a beeyotch and so am I.

OK so I need a creative outlet because I have way too much brain energy. So I started making t-shirts. I like them. You might not and that’s ok. But I’m gonna try and start making and selling at least one shirt a month. Why not, right? Once I start making money off of them, I’m gonna do a charity tie in. I’m gonna post a pic of the current shirt and tell you that it’s $15 plus shipping and handling. So message me on FB if you want one. I am doing PayPal invoices for payment. Just FYI.

I noticed yesterday after being followed and flipped off by Mr. Bad driving jerkface in a pickup that my Kelly Kapowski t-shirts are now on clearance at the Target off of 635 and MacArthur in Irving. If you want one. It’s a real convo starter.

Is Casey Anthony pregnant? I pray to God not. I’m gonna wait for confirmation on this one before I go off on a rant. I will say this. I will definitely question God’s better judgement if she is. Should a convicted sex offender be able to make babies to abuse as they see fit? Not in my mind. So why should a baby killer be allowed to reproduce more babies to kill? Sickening. And if there was ever a reason to question faith, I firmly believe that would be it. But I won’t go off on that yet. I’m gonna wait.

Oh, and I’m officially going full steam ahead with this DJ thing. I just published our new website. It’s

Agirlandsomeguysdj.com. We also have a FB page under the same name. Minus the .com. So check us out. Hire us. Pay my bills!!!

Monday, March 4, 2013

Airplanes and Toyotas...oh my!

Today’s song is…Eminem and D12- “My Band.” You know that one? My blog, my blog, my blog, my blog, my blog, my blog, my bloooooooogggggggg… Haha. I love you, Jose Chavez.

Lots of random stuff to put into your pretty little head today. I hope you’re ready for this.

Do birds get cold? Poor little birds all out in the cold and stuff. They can’t have fat on them to keep them warm. They fly in all kinds of weather. I live in the south and it still gets chilly down here. So how do birds not get hypothermia? I don’t get it.

On an airplane I can’t help but ask…why do people sit in a window seat if they’re not gonna look out? Or put the little shade down? At least during take-off and landing. I prefer a window seat. Mostly because I’m that girl who passes out as soon as we reach like 1,000 feet and I like having the side of the plane to lean on. Napping in the middle or aisle seat isn’t gonna happen. So knowing that there are people who prefer that seat and knowing that you don’t and you can request a different seat, why do they keep the window seat? I’m just wondering…I guess I could just as easily ask to change my seat, but I fly standby, so I have to be happy with any seat on the plane as long as I’m on it. So give me a break, people!!!

Orange Starbursts are wasted on me. They’re awful! If I was Starburst, I would sell just red and pink packages. And maybe even an occasional yellow. But orange? I could send orange Starbursts to starving kids in other countries, but I don’t eat them very often because the orange ones are there. Ditch the orange, Starburst. Come on!

Oh. And one other comment about flying. I know just as well as everyone else that it’s unnecessary to have all portable electronic devices powered off and stowed away during take off and landing. I get it. I, too, would love to turn around and tell the pushy flight attendant to just shut it. So do me a favor, rule breakers. If you’re gonna keep your portable electronic devices powered on when you fly, at least HIDE IT! Please. The quicker the flight attendant does that safety demo that nobody pays attention to (admit it. You know I’m right…), the quicker we can take off and get where we’re going. And then we won’t have to be cooped up in a plane with people who deny the power of deodorant, or those who think that Subway is appropriate airplane food, or that screaming baby (I know parents try and calm them down. I do. But that doesn’t make the screaming any more bearable while it’s happening), or the armrest hog, or the person with the smokers cough who refuses to cover their mouth. You get what I’m saying. Do us all a favor and at least lock your screen while they do the final walk through. Please.

I’ve done a lot of research on what I’m about to say. If by research I mean noticing in the conditions that surround me. I now know who the worst and rudest drivers and parkers are in this world. Toyota drivers. I’m sorry. And I know you’re getting all defensive now saying “I drive a Corolla and I’ve never hit anybody or got a ticket or blah, blah, blah.” Yes. There are exceptions. However, generally speaking, the drivers who usually piss me off the most are in Toyotas. I think that Toyota should offer driving courses upon the sale of a car. And manners lessons. Don’t double park. Don’t drive the wrong way down an aisle to steal that spot. Don’t be that person who sits there blocking the aisle with your blinker on waiting for the spot occupied by the woman with 19 kids and 97 bags of groceries. Move on! Please. Anyway, that’s how I feel about that.

And lastly. Do you want to buy a St. Patricks Day t-shirt I made on my laptop? The saying is NOT original…at all. But I put it all together. I will put a pic on here and then if anybody wants to order one, get a price and see if its even possible. Maybe Toyota drivers will buy lots of shirts to make up for sucking on the road. Maybe.

That’s all for now. I have to go and see how Tierra lights up the room when she walks in.