Monday, August 24, 2015

Teenage Mutant Ninja Headlice- A jingle!

I'm gonna start and finish this with a typical Shanon thought. Do you think they will make a cartoon called Teenage Mutant Ninja Head Lice to teach kids about preventative measures of not getting infected? Or is that a Michael Bay lawsuit waiting to happen? Just think of the theme song potential. I'm winging this.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Head Lice x3
Crawling to your friends head
Mutant larvae
They're in schools in 30 different states
When your head gets itchy don't scratch
The nits and eggs are under attack
Teenage Mutant Ninja Head Lice

Don't judge or hate. I seriously did that with Siri as I drove and corrected it when I wasn't.

Do you ever feel like you just NEED a fountain drink? I feel like that. I even went to McDonalds to get one before work, but they didn’t answer at the drive through! So I backed up and went to the other lane…but no answer there, either! What the heck! I talked to the speaker, knocked on it, stared at it, tickled it a little…I’m so confused. No fountain drink for me. No egg white delight. And no bacon, egg, and cheese McGriddle for Trey, either.

You know one of the biggest problems with Facebook? Idiots.

See…my brain can go from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Head Lice jingles to idiots to changing my cars name.

I think I need to change the name of my car from Kelly Clarkson to something else. It’s purely personal. I just don’t feel the same love that I used to for Kelly anymore. I used to look at my car and see “Kelly.” It doesn’t happen that way anymore. I look at my cat and I see “Brody.” I look at my sister and I see “Sam.” What do I see when I look at my car? Maybe I need to name her after a rapper. I love rap. Maybe Spindarella. The wheels spin. It’s kind of like Cinderella who does ride in a carriage, which is a means of transportation. I have met Spindarella. I did meet the girl who said Spindarella was her sister, which I took literally. Come to find out they were just good friends and not actually blood relatives. I felt so dumb. I love that song “None of Your Business.” So yeah…maybe my cars new name is Spindarella. I’ll call her Spin for short. Spinny can be her pet name. When Rihanna’s “Umbrella” comes on, that part where she says “ella, ella, ella, eh, eh, eh…” can be Spin’s theme song. I truly think this was meant to be! I think this decision was truly meant to be. Right now. At this time. Funny how God works, huh?

Do you think there should be a ban on birthday candles? Have you ever given any thought to how unsanitary they really are? People will walk around a public place with a surgical mask on their face to prevent the spread of germs, but we’re OK with people blowing all over a cake to extinguish candles and then eat it like it’s never been possibly spit upon? I don’t like candles on birthday cakes. I know that I’m OCD. I’m a freak about birthday candles. I am weird about whose birthday cake I will eat if there have been candles blown out. Of course kids are gonna lose a little spit when they blow, but they’re kids. They’re perfect and can’t be blamed. I’ll eat their cake. But if there’s the obligatory birthday cake at work and there’s someone who dips or something and they blow out candles…I’ll admit. I’m probably not going to eat that cake. I’ll give a birthday hug or whatever if I truly wish them a happy year. I don’t wish anyone a bad year, but I wish just an average year for a few people. I don wish itchy days for some…itching does suck. But I don’t wish bad on anyone unless they truly earn it. And then I think karma will bite them in the butt, so I just wish karma on them. So then it’s really me hoping for what they put out in the world to come back to them. Anyway, back to birthday candles. No, BTW…I’m not on drugs. I don’t understand why more people don’t think about the things I do. This stuff is REAL. Its gonna be me and the cockroaches and all the other non-birthday candles blowers running around in the end and all the haters gonna be up there or down there still hating. It’s OK. I won’t say I told you so.

I did get a rash on Saturday after DJing a pool party and it kind of weirded me out. I’ve gotten heat rashes before, but that was from riding my bike for too long and rubbing my butt on the seat and irritating it. This was on the inner folds of both my arms. Then it started going down and around my arms and on my chest. My lips were itching. Does that mean I’m allergic to heat? I took some Benadryl and rubbed some cream on it and it was better on Sunday, but then it started to pop back up a little on Sunday night. Seriously though. Do I officially have an excuse to only stay in an air-conditioned environment from now on?

Do you ever wonder why some companies fail to make the things that you love the most? Have you ever tried Neutrogena’s Pomegranate Rainbath body soap? If you’ve not, you’re missing out. Even the regular smelling one is heaven, but the pomegranate is my favorite. You can’t really find it much, though. I have a Sam’s Club membership and they have the big bottles of it at some stores for like $17.99, but it’s not often you find it. They have this blue bottle and, of course, the normal scented one. Why not the pomegranate? I think the beauty of pomegranate is truly lost on the world sometimes. It’s really my favorite smell when it comes to stuff I use to clean my body with. My skin is super sensitive, so I can’t use a lot of smelly things. I can use that stuff, though, and it’s never bothered me. I also use the store brand of the Neutrogena body oil out of the shower (while I’m still wet) and that works well, too. I can’t use many face washes or moisturizers because they burn SO bad. So I started using either Cataphyll wash or Cera Ve wash and Cera Ve sunscreen as moisturizer. It’s a specific one, though. Any other kind makes my face feel like it’s on fire. Why am I talking about this? I don’t even know.

I’m going to also tell you about another one of my most favorite things. You have likely never had these before unless you just stumbled upon them and were blessed to enjoy their greatness. Sanuk shoes. OMG. They are SO insanely comfortable. They last forever, too. I don’t get paid to mention anything about anything, so don’t go thinking that. I was just thinking as I was wearing them the other day, “Man…I should tell people about these. They’re to comfortable not to tell people about.” So here I am telling you about the. I have some loafers, flip flops, boat shoes, and I give them as gifts. If you have the Zulily app on your phone, they put them on there a lot. The yoga mat bottoms are to die for. Seriously. Anyway, now I feel like I should be getting paid to talk about these, so I’m going to shut up about them now.

I guess that’s really all I’ve got right now. I just figured some lighthearted talk about nothing would do my soul some good. I think I’m right. It did. Thanks for being so awesome. I love your love and appreciate you more than you know.

No comments:

Post a Comment